Taliban Implements A New Strategy
In order to escape US Marines targeting the Taliban in Afghanistan, some Taliban members have implemented a new strategy.
“They are trading in their robes, turbans, and decrepit beards for Teletubbie costumes“, stated our CNN correspondent via satellite telephone.
“Many of our Marines and other soldiers are still teenagers who grew up with the Teletubbies. While they know that Teletubbies are not real, and especially that they would not encounter a Teletubbie in the deserts of Afghanistan… there is a momentary shock and surprise which allows the Taliban enough time to run away and evade capture. Furthermore, many soldiers are reluctant to fire their weapons at cute cartoon characters. General Petreus is working on a counter strategy… outfitting US soldiers in Ahmad Duck and Mahmoud Mouse (beloved Islamic cartoon characters) costumes. Then, when our soldiers are surprised by a Taliban Teletubbie, the Taliban Teletubbie is at the same time surprised by Ahmad Duck or Mahmoud Mouse; which evens the playing field. They are both momentarily surprised and shocked.“
