Al Queda Claims Responsibility for Kennedy Tumor
“I just wave my hand like this - and BAM! You have malignant tumor. BAM! You have lung cancer. BAM! You have missing bladder. BAM! You have bad headache. The power of Allah flows through my fingers.”
An Al Queda operative who would only identify himself as “Akbar Smith” today claimed responsibility for causing the malignant tumor recently discovered in Senator Ted Kennedy.
“You remember James Brown? Anna Nicole Smith? Heath Ledger? Eddy Arnold? I killed them. I just wave my hand like this - and BAM!”
Real True Internet News asked Akbar to provide a demonstration of his power.
“I do not kill indiscriminately. I only kill those who Allah commands me to kill. You are lucky today, you are not on the list.”
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